Book: Mansfield Park and Mummies: Monster Mayhem, Matrimony, Ancient Curses, True Love, and Other Dire Delights
ISBN-13: 978-1607620471
Author: Jane Austen and Vera Nazarian
Publisher: Curiosities
Genre: Parody / Humor
Release: November 16, 2009
Length: 568 pages (Paperback)
Rating: B (85)
Verdict
Mansfield Park and Mummies is a hilarious satire. Nazarian puts a Monty Python spin on one of the most deadly dull classics of English literature and succeeds in transforming it into a hilarious farce, while still remaining true enough to the tone of the original tale that its deliciously ridiculous premise never overtakes the authenticity of its tone.
If you liked Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, you need to read this book. It’s a pitch perfect encore.
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Pros: The irreverent tone is perfectly executed. Tongue-in-cheek humor and vivid visuals read like a theatrical play.
Cons: Very long, even with hilarious sub-plots. Why always Jane Austin?
Synopsis
In Brief: Fanny Price, a young girl from a poor family, is brought to Mansfield Park by her rich aunt and uncle, Lady Bertram and Sir Thomas. However, upon arrival, she find the household in the thrall of some dark curse: her aunt is in the grip of some supernatural obsession with Egypt; Lady Bertram’s skinflint sister suffers from a bout of lycanthropy; there’s a vampire in the neighborhood; and a demonic duck lurks around every corner. When Mummies begin to return from the dead, the house falls into whimsical chaos with Fanny at the center of it all.
Official: Our gentle yet indomitable heroine Fanny Price must hold steadfast not only against the seductive charms of Henry Crawford but also an Ancient Egyptian Pharaoh!
Meanwhile, the indubitably handsome and kind hero Edmund attempts Exorcisms… Miss Crawford vamps out… Aunt Norris channels her inner werewolf… The Mummy-mesmerized Lady Bertram collects Egyptian artifacts…
There can be no doubt that Mansfield Park has become a battleground for the forces of Ancient Evil and Regency True Love!
Review
Let me preface this review with the disclosure that I am not, in any way a Jane Austen fan. I’ve read abridged editions of some of her more popular work. I’ve been dragged to seen the movies. Still, I’ve never found any of it to be of any interest.
However, Mansfield Park and Mummies is a pleasure to read. The best way to describe it is as a Victorian Monty Python sketch. Nazarian lets Austen set the stage, then relegates the drudgery of the original Mansfield Park storyline to the background, as she proceeds to unfold a hilarious monster-strewn farce told in a perfect imitation of Austen’s own narrative style.
In Nazarian’s version of Mansfield Park, the Bertram family has fallen under some fell Curse. Lady Bertram is transforming her estate into a small piece of Egypt, artifact by artifact. Auntie Norris grows increasingly wolfish, though the other family members are too well-mannered to notice. The Crawfords are undead; their daughter Mary is a Vampire.
Soon, dear Mr. Rushworth falls victim to Aunt Norris. Mummies risen from the dead shamble about the estate, preying on the servants. Mary is hunted by Fanny. Fanny is courted the Pharoh. A much dreaded duck stalks the grounds. And, of course, being Victorian England, everyone is far too polite to make any mention of any of it.
So, it’s up to Fanny, who is unaffected by either the hypnotic nature of the vampires or the compelling force of the mummies to save Mansfield Park and all of its inhabitants. The result is that Austen’s doorstop of a classic flies by with hilarity at every turn.
It is possibly the most theatrical book I’ve ever come across. The entire time I was reading it, I was thinking what an incredible stage play it would make. It would be something like a cross between The Importance of Being Ernest and Scooby Doo… (Keep in mind that comparing a book to Scooby Doo is high praise coming from a child of the eighties.)
Among the high points of Mansfield Park and Mummies are Nazarian’s “scholarly footnotes and appendices” which interject colorful commentary throughout the book. Here’s one of the best:
The distasteful pastime of Acting, in particular the enactment of indelicate, suggestive and compromising roles for modern, well-bred young ladies, is a grave sin. Gentle Reader, it is the equal of holding a Mardi Gras in the drawing room, complete with bead tossing, pole dancing, topless floats—in short, nudity and adult situations. It is not to be borne.
The book’s single largest shortcoming is its enormous length. 568 pages is a bit much for a comedy, especially one built atop an already established work like Mansfield Park.
It seems to takes far too many pages for the titular mummies to first appear, and up to that point, the story makes for difficult reading. That, however, is less a criticism and more of a compliment on Nazarian’s skill as a writer, because the beginning of book is where the Austen’s original work shows through. Once Nazarian takes up the reigns, the story transforms into a rather raucous page-turner.
The dramatic transformation from drudgery to delirium is enough to make one hope that, when Nazarian next ventures into comedy, she leaves Austen behind and gives us a taste of her own unadulterated brilliance. Because the only thing holding Mansfield Park and Mummies back from making the bestseller’s list is JANE AUSTEN.
Until Nazarian’s next work, though, readers will have to settle for her sharing the spotlight.
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