10. Clients initially mistake your documentation for a fortune when it falls out the box.
09. Your post-development support consists of handing over a link to the most appropriate programming forum.
08. Your code comments read like the voice-over track of an old episode of MST3K.
07. You maintain a Buddhist outlook on programming: all code must eventually be reincarnated somewhere.
06. You throw in large chunks of code “just in case,” but when confronted, the only “in case” you can cite is the apocalypse.
05. When co-workers try to strike up a conversation on the Church-Turing Thesis, you maintain that you aren’t religious.
04. You begin billing by volume because its more profitable, but you sell at bulk rates after the first hundred thousand lines.
03. Bug tracking is your favorite hobby. You just love watching the little critters grow from glitches into full system crashes.
02. You start all of your projects with a UML model that looks as if it were created by the Underpants Gnomes.
01. You go around bragging on what an amazing programmer you are.
“Ten Signs that you’re a Bad Programmer” was written by Pipedreamergrey and originally posted to The Great Geek Manual. It may be reposted so long as this notice remains intact. Copyright 2009 Pipedreamergrey.
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