As you all undoubtedly know, yesterday Gary Gygax, the father of Dungeons & Dragons, died of an abdominal aneurysm at his home in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin. The news shot through the net, and there has been a massive upswell of sympathy and grief from D&D fans around the world. Many of them, being social misfits, are expressing their grief in creative, even playful ways.
1. Last night, thousands of the most fervent players gathered in emergency gaming sessions around the globe in an attempt to toss a saving throw on Gary’s behalf, to no avail.
2. Tonight, Dwarves everywhere will raise toasts in Gary’s honor, and to demonstrate the true depths of their grief, they’ll actually wait until they’re sober to do so.
3. For the remainder of the month, all loyal D&D fans will only be rolling black dice for the remainder of the month, even if it means their game won’t involve any greataxe damage because they’re missing their d12.
4. For the rest of the week, magic user across the globe will be wearing their black robes to work, regardless of alignment.
5. For weeks to come, every time a DM uses the adjectives “large and hairy” in their campaign narration, loyal bands of companions will burst into tears, overcome with fond memories of Gary.
6. Nostalgic games will be run with with first edition manuals, leaving fourth edition preview manuals to be burned in effigy… or, well… at least stored out of sight of other player, because, let’s face it, they’re not cheap.
7. Older, more experienced players will come to the aid of younger, less experienced players, in order to help them grapple with the depression involved in the loss of their beloved scion, reminding them that grappling begins with Table 7-1 in the Monster Manual and is rolled much like a melee attack, but with a special size modifier…
8. Many will turn on their Peter Jackson Lord of the Rings merchandise, enraged in their grief that they were foolish enough to allow another fantasy system to occupy the time that they should have spent appreciating Gary’s world… but, of course, they will be careful not to damage the original packaging.
9. Some will even go so far as to approach girls, desperately seeking a date for Friday night, just so that they can cancel it to express the sheer import of their upcoming weekend Farewell game.
10. And of course, as when any event rocks our little Geek world, they shall seek out and spread humorous postings to mark memorialize the event.
“Top Ten ways Players are Grieving for Gary Gygax” was written by Pipedreamergrey and originally posted to The Great Geek Manual. It may be reposted so long as this notice remains intact. © 2008 Pipedreamergrey
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